Who are “Highly Perceptive People”? 

Highly perceptive people have heightened sensitivity to details; they see life in high definition. They notice micro changes in other people’s expressions. They immediately register emotional flips in others and their minds go crazy trying to interpret those changes. They may be highly sensitive to sounds, lights, tastes, smells and touch; even a little of these stimuli is enough to raise alerts in their minds. They are the ones who have difficulty not to give or not to be there for others; the pain of other beings, animals and plants included, they perceive as their own and feel compelled to do something about it. 

They are curious about the world; pursue their interest no matter the dangers; work hard to integrate the tiny details into one big, coherent picture to make sense of it all. They create a world of their own; explain their findings in unconventional manners. Unquestionable authority does not exist for them. For better and for worse, they are the ones who see that the emperor is naked. They walk away from the staged dramas of life that are set by the powers and powers-to-be. 

Highly perceptive people may be well educated if they have been lucky to have supportive families. They may be chronic underachievers especially if their environment did not understand them and did not provide them with proper role models. Not necessarily because parents didn’t try but perhaps they did not know better how to be there for this curious, sensitive, and responsive kid.  

The possibility of abuse in childhood cannot be excluded. Kids who don’t conform, have a mind of their own, respond intensely to small things in their environment and have lots of questions about the status quo tend to evoke impatience and short-temperedness in already stressed-out parents and other adults.  

Why Would Highly Perceptive People Need Therapy?

1. Lack of role models – and you just stumble around 

Perceptiveness can be a curse as much as a blessing if you are not aware of it and don’t know how to use it productively. It is a bit like Edward Scissorhands: you have to learn to use your unusual skills on your own if you haven’t had role models. If you have noticed only the destruction that your curiosity and unconventional behavior have caused, then you may end up feeling confused or bad about yourself. You may need someone who can help sort things out. 

2. Perfectionism – frantic effort to organize the HD world 

The more information we work with, the more fractured our minds tend to become. You need to find room for every detail; they all have to fit into a coherent whole. High standards are hard to reach. Perfectionism is likely and it can hurt you if you can’t let go.  

You may have gotten lost in the minute nuances; perhaps to the extent of diagnosable OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) or OCPD (Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder). The massive amount of information and your internal need to process it all may have overwhelmed you to create anxiety and sleep problems.  

3. Sensory overload slows down processing 

Increasing amount of information that comes from attention to details slows down processing and integration and may increase impatient frustration. Taking in that much takes time, which is of short supply in our culture where time is of essence while we are constantly competing with so many brilliant minds. A sense of inadequacy when you see so many others – but you – succeed may be lurking at you. 

4. Curiosity drives you to the Unknown – without skills to feel successful 

Curiosity drives you constantly to uncharted territories. You may end up failing one too many times and feeling inadequate. Well, if you keep facing challenges, you may develop the notion of yourself as constantly struggling against the wind. If you don’t understand yourself you may think that you are not enough to conquer your challenges. 

People who are masters of their universe are the ones who have settled down and limit their vision to what they already know. Highly perceptive people are the Travelers of Endless Roads (the Fools of the Tarot cards) who have but questions and a sense of wonder. The only thing that keeps their attention is what they don’t know or haven’t experienced yet. They need space and freedom to breathe otherwise they become claustrophobic. 

5. Sense of abuse in lack of abuse 

If you are sensitive then you don’t have to be abused or neglected in the pathological sense of the term “trauma” to carry deep impressions with you. Ordinary events may overwhelm your sensitive circuits. Sensitivity to stimuli may lead one to exhaustion and then to needing to isolate from the dramas of life. Isolation or lack of quality companionship may lead you to depression. Low self-esteem is common.  

6. Over-reactivity: sensing and acting are separable 

The most important problem with highly sensitive people I think is their over-reactivity to events. They become too angry, too depressed, too withdrawn, too worked-up, too upset, too jumpy too quickly, for too long, and too often. They often lash out at others instead of communicating and negotiating with their environment.  

They find it difficult to contain their sensory input; their need for integration to perfection and to connect the dots; and their smart conclusions and their high standards for self and others. 

7. Hard to share intense experiences in the absence of proper language  

They experience every day how limiting language can be – this wonderful tool that has created civilizations. Their palette of experiences contains too many shades of each color to verbalize them clearly and concisely. They get impatient with people who do not share their refined sensors and sensitivity to details. 

How can Highly Perceptive People Create an Integrated and Meaningful Life?

1) Know that you are not sick. Don’t blame others for not living up to your standards or yourself for being such a misfit. Guilt (“What did I do wrong?”) and shame (“I have no value for others”) only adds to your suffering but does not solve any of your problems. 

2) Embrace your issue of ill-fittedness, the part of you that causes you trouble. Seek to understand what good it has done for you. 

3) If overreaction is a problem for you, understand that perception and re-action are separable. The principle of self-control sits between sensing and acting.  

4) Use mindfulness to slow down your fired-up nerves and calculate your choices before you respond.  

5) Communicate effectively with your surrounding. Identify and ask for what you need. Teach others how to love and support you. 

6) Carry your gift with dignity. Seek to develop it since it is your responsibility to use it constructively.  

Little by little, your world will coalesce into one coherent yet fluid reality. Your life will become integrated and meaningful to you and to others through understanding and wise actions.